Lack of School Spirit

So apparently UNT is trying to start a chapter of Harry Potter Alliance. Oddly though, this doesn't excite me nearly as much as it should   But it is Harry Potter related and I SHOULD be excited about it. What's wrong with me?!

Quite honestly I just don't feel any loyalty or school spirit toward the University. I don't really understand it. I feel as though it's just a school that I'm going to so I can finish my degree. My master's classes are all online so I have no real need to go to campus. I don't even have really a need to be in Denton. (I'm there to try and have a better opportunity to find a job but no luck yet). Quite honestly, I'm feeling a bit of hatred toward the University and quite honestly toward Denton. I don't really like it there that much.

It's just that I don't know anyone whatsoever there. I know a couple of people now (neighbors and public library staff). But otherwise no one really friendwise. There's no one I can really talk to. I'm lonely. I knew part of this all is my doing. Actually most of it is. I don't know what's wrong with me.

I know things happened since moving to Denton that have had an impact on me.  Things that have possibly made things worse for me.

I feel as though I'm unhappy with my life in Denton but don't know how to fix it.  I return to my own apartment on the 18th.  I'm not ready to. I don't want to go back to the loneliness. I just really don't want to be unhappy anymore but don't really know how to begin fixing it.

I've already been told by my parents that things will be different this semester. Things are going to be emotionally challenging for me. I know such things have to happen in order for me to grow up but I just don't know.


I just want to know why it's so hard for me. Why I feel so bitter and such hatred toward Denton (I don't really) . I just want to make sense of it all.