Bullied

It seems like something everyone goes through. Well, at least a lot of nerds go through.

Yes, I was bullied when I was younger.  I don't feel that it was as bad as some others have gone through but it's still something I went through.

I honestly can't remember if I've ever mentioned it on here before or not. In fact, I haven't really told many people. I'm pretty sure I've never told my family.

I guess the reason I've never told them is because nothing serious ever happened and I guess at the time, I just didn't see it as interfering with my life that much. It didn't really interfere with my life. I still acted the same. I still went about my normal life.

I'm sure that had things continued or gotten worse, I would have spoken up more. 

They really did nothing to physically hurt me or stop me from going to school.

To be honest, I do remember being a little more worried about walking home from school alone. That's it.  The other things was that it took place toward the end of the school year. It wasn't like it had been going on the whole year.  It was literally the last couple months of school when it happened.

I really don't remember much about the details but I'll try to explain as much as I can. 

I was in 7th grade at the time. 7th grade hadn't been too bad for me. I remember being worried about starting Junior High (although technically the school had changed to be Middle School by then. Just that year.) but it wasn't that bad. I made some friends. One being a girl I'd met at one of the Recreation Center's Summer Camp. Things were pretty good.

Then one day, I was walking home from school when I noticed a couple girls following me. I was pretty sure they were 8th graders since they were taller than me and looked older.  The girls followed me all the way. I didn't know who they were or why they would be following me. They followed me all the way to my house. They certainly made me nervous following me but I tried not to think too much about it.

Another day, I was walking home and again they followed me. Well, actually I guess you could say I followed them. They were in front of me.  They got to my house and sat down on the curb in front of our back gate. The gate, I normally went in to go inside the back door. I remember walking passed them on the opposite side of the street to get around them. I didn't want to ask them to move. I guess something just told me that they weren't very nice. Somehow I walked around them and went in the front door instead.

Another day, I remember walking home when they met up with me. Walking the same way I was. They said some things to me and pushed me a little bit. I guess really what they did was harass me a bit. I don't remember if I did or said anything in response. I don't think I did though.

I'm not entirely sure when this all took place. I'm not even sure if some of the things didn't happen the same day.

All I know is that these girls harassed me for unknown reasons. I remember sometime after the first time, they saw me at school along with another guy and they were just plain mean to me.  Harassing me for no apparent reason.

Why they went after me, I never did know. I guess I will never know.

I do remember supposedly they said, I'd said something mean to one of their boyfriends. Who that supposed boyfriend was, again, I don't know. Basically they were getting back at me for that reason. I honestly don't  even believe that was the real reason they were picking on me. They just did.

As for me supposedly saying something mean to someone, I honestly don't think I did. I'm just not a very mean person. If you know me now, you know I'm a nice person. I don't tend to say anything mean about someone.  I'm really nice and I know I've been that way for a long time.

I vaguely remember telling my friends about these people and eventually we learned their names. We actually learned their names when the yearbooks came out. I think it was when one of the 8th graders came into one of the 7th grade classrooms to have one of the teachers sign her yearbook that we learned one of their names. I remember one of my friends casually glancing at her yearbook and learning what the girl's name was. I don't know if I asked my friend to do that or not. I just remember her doing it and telling me later that the girl's name was Nicola. I somehow learned that the other girl's name was Courtney and that the guy's name was Ryan.  (I still remember their names because they are crossed out in my yearbook.)

 I remember going to the Principal after awhile because I know I didn't feel very safe. The girls had already laid their hands on me. They had shoved me a bit.Sure they hadn't really hurt me but I felt like they could.  I also vaguely remember them threatening me. 

Because it was toward the end of the school year when this happened, there wasn't much the principal could do. Especially since none of them had done any real harm to me. They were also 8th graders which meant that they would be moving on to the high school. I'm sure had I been in 6th grade and they'd been in 7th and had been doing this, I'm sure they would have continued the next year and then it wold have been more concerning.

Still at least I did tell someone even though she really couldn't help. They never did bother me again after school ended.

I still don't know why all of a sudden they decided to harass me or anything. Why it was me they decided to go after.

I guess that's the thing about bullies and bullying though.
There is no real reason they do it. They just do.

The thing is though, that I survived. Sure my experience isn't that bad but it's still an experience. It still had an effect on me.

 If someone is bullying you, tell someone. You don't have to take it. You are stronger than they are. Telling someone isn't a sign of weakness. It's a strength. It shows that you know this isn't right and something needs to be done. It's a power you have.

If you see someone else being bullied, speak up! It's hard to I know but it's not worth it to let someone else get hurt.

Bullying in any form is wrong. No one should have to feel like they are worthless. That they have to take it.

I've been through my share of struggles in life. I'm still struggling. But despite everything, I'm still going. Somehow I've made it through and you can too.  Things do get better.  It may take some time but they really do get better.