Wednesday, April 4, 2012

BEDA Day 4: Not a Gryffindor

As you know, I was sorted into Hufflepuff in Pottermore. While it wasn't my first choice for a house, I've come to accept it and realize that it actually fits me. Prior to Pottermore, I thought of myself as being a Gryffinclaw; Gryffindor and Ravenclaw hybrid. I  related myself a lot to Hermione and I still do. However, I'm starting to think that perhaps  I'm not really a Gryffindor at all. Perhaps I never really was. I still think of my as a Ravenclaw though. More of a Ravenpuff/Huffleclaw hybrid now than a Gryffinclaw.

I thought I was daring, courageous, and had nerve as well as being chivalrous. I thought I was brave. Yet lately though, I've been thinking how perhaps I'm not really any of these traits.

I'm not outgoing not that that has anything to do with it. I lack self-confidence and am really not as daring as I thought. I don't take a lot of risks.  As for bravery, well maybe I am but then again not really.

I'm sort of a wimp I feel sometimes. I seem to have quite a few fears. I have an insect phobia; I don't like bees or bugs (a certain type).  I'm also not a big fan of thunderstorms. They make me extremely nervous especially when there's possibilities of tornado developing.  As evident by yesterday's posting, I freak out when that happens. I also have a bit of social anxiety which I guess isn't exactly a trait of being Gryffindor but it is fear-related.

I don't feel like I'm a very brave person.  The wiki for Harry Potter says that Gryffindors are brave to the point of almost being reckless at times. This really isn't me at all. I'm not a reckless person.  I'm not too much of a risk taker. I don't even venture out all that much. 

The more I look at the description for Hufflepuff and  Ravenclaw, I can't help but feel that they are more accurate.  Hufflepuffs value hard work, patience, loyalty, and fair play. I'm definately a loyal person. To my family and my friends. That much is certain. As for hard working, I guess you can say that. I mean I am focused on my goals. Right now my degree is much more important than starting a relationship with someone and I do work hard. Patience? Well, I actually consider myself to be more of an impatient person. Finally, fair play. I guess this is pretty true as well. I don't like people being unfair to me so I try not to be unfair to them.

As for Ravenclaw traits:   wit, learning, and wisdom. I definitely fit a lot of these traits. I enjoy learning and I am considered to be pretty intelligent. However, I was sorted into Hufflepuff.
I consider Hufflepuff to be a house of people with multiple talents. People in Hufflepuff don't necessarily fits the traits of the other houses because we have traits from the various houses.

Perhaps I really am not much of a Gryffindor after all.  I mean I don't exactly see myself as being really a brave person. I guess I'm kinda like Neville.  He didn't  consider himself to be very brave and (POTTERMORE SPOILER ALERT!) wanted to be in Hufflepuff but the sorting hat chose Gryffindor sensing that he truly was brave but just didn't see it yet. Maybe I am brave and just don't see it.

Like I said, I can relate a lot to Hermione. I'm smart like she is and can be a bit of a know-it-all at times. I also didn't make friends easily at first and spend a lot of time in the library. There's more but those are some of the more obvious ones. Also, like her boggart, one of my fears is to fail.I guess it's because I felt like I could relate to Hermione the most that I considered myself to be a Gryffindor in the first place.

But I also consider myself to be a bit like Luna as well. A bit quirky and different. Unique.Someone who didn't quite fit in. That's a part of me as well. I definitely didn't feel like I fit in. That  I'm different.

However while I don't quite feel like a Gryffindor anymore perhaps part of me still is one. My counselors have told me that I'm a fighter. That despite all I've been through, I have not really given up.  I continue to fight despite everything. I've had my share of struggles but somehow I've made my way through them. To me this fighting spirit makes me think of bravery and makes me think that perhaps I am a bit of a Gryffindor after all.

No comments:

Post a Comment